– The main question every boy asks himself is
“Do I have what it takes?” Can I be a hero? Will I be able to fight for what is important in life? Dad’s must answer this question for them. Boys want their fathers to be impressed
with them.
– The main question every girl asks herself is
“Am I lovely?” Can I be a princess? Will I be worth fighting for? Dad’s must answer this question for them. Girls want their fathers to be captivated
by them.
– Every father needs to tell his son
“You have what it takes”. Every father needs to tell his daughter “You are lovely”
. Over and over.
– The worst fear of every man is
failure, that he in fact “might not have what it takes.” The worst fear of every woman is abandonment, that she might be unloved.
– Until a man knows he is a man, he will forever be trying to prove he is one, while at the same time he will shrink from anything that might reveal he is not. When a young woman has not heard “You are lovely” from her father, nine times out of ten she will turn to a young man to try to get the answer to her question. Promiscuity among teenage girls is always directly related to an absent father. It is
the father’s voice
that is the most powerful voice in the world to them.
– Most fathers find it hard to validate their children because they have a
wound
in their own soul.
– To find healing for your wound, ask Jesus into the broken and unhealed places of your heart; grieve your wound; let God love you; forgive your father for his failures with you; then, ask God to father you. Stay with the Question, “Do I have what it takes?” until it is answered by him.
– It’s never too late. Validate your children now. Ask them how you are doing. Ask them for forgiveness for your failures. Demonstrate your repentance for failing them.
– In the end, the most important issue is
love. Your kids want to know you delight in them. Our most fundamental mission as parents in this life is to make sure that our children know we love them.
Source:
Eldredge, John. You Have What It Takes
. Thomas Nelson, Inc: Nashville, TN. 2004.